Tonight's training involves violent video games. Actually, I’m terrible at playing video games. I really don’t like them that much either. Truthfully, I’m not even playing. But my almost-15-year-old son, Micah, loves them. And he narrates every move. Since I was able to compete in an open water swim race yesterday, and go on a beautiful tempo run tonight on my way home, I’m fine that my training tonight is resting with Micah. Micah is my favorite person. He has no interest in triathlons. We took him out of all sports in 5th grade, and he’s never ridden a bike without training wheels. When he swims he’s towed around by whoever is assigned to him at the YMCA. He has never run. It takes about a half hour to get him out of bed. So he is not the least bit interested in watching me compete at races that take an hour drive from our Gig Harbor home and start at 7 am. He prefers a few more hours of sleep, and getting up and talking mom into letting him play…. video games. Or do a puzzle. Or watch YouTube videos. Or even go to a museum. It does not bother me in the least that Micah would rather “snipe a ghoul” in his video game than run a mile, swim a lap, or bike around the block. That is because he can’t. Yet, Micah is why I tri. Micah has Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. He was diagnosed at 3 years old. He took his last self propelled steps at 10. And, he’s been in a wheelchair for nearly five years. It’s the disease many of us noticed during Jerry Lewis’s MD telethon. Some time ago, one of my amazing business partners at the Hester Law Group and RTB triathlete, Brett Purtzer, challenged fellow partner and triathlete Casey Arbenz and me to join him to see if we could complete a sprint tri. We did. And we all somehow found ourselves on the podium in our age groups. And we haven’t quit. It’s been 6 years. We were inspired for more. Our bodies slimmed. Our energy improved. And our enthusiasm and goal setting took off as athletes and it rubbed off professionally as well. At the end of that first tri season, while attending a conference, another dad with a son living with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy challenged me to run the New York City Marathon as a fund raising event, raising funds for muscular dystrophy research and advocacy. I didn’t quite get why people would donate money to a non-profit in honor of my run. But they did, and quite generously. I was shocked by the outpouring of love and interest others had in partnering with me seeking a cure and researching optimal care for Micah and boys like him. Six weeks later I ran my first marathon. Crossing the finish line in Central Park was one of the proudest moments of my life. The final 10 miles were painful, and it was especially brutal and beyond my expectations from the “wall” at 18 miles on. I had run out of coping methods by mile 20. I refused to walk. The unbelievable cheering crowd helped. But suddenly I was struck by a conviction to focus on the real reason I was there - finding a cure, slowing Micah’s disease, and optimizing his care. Soon my thoughts were on the generous people behind the thousands of dollars I had raised. I thanked God for every one of their generous gifts and compassion for Micah. I prayed my thank-you notes back to the donors would include reporting that I actually finished the race. I also thought about the privilege of being Micah’s dad - of the closeness that comes from helping Micah brush his teeth every night, putting on his orthotic night boots, and laying with him for a minute while he reports the days Sponge Bob antics. My drifting thoughts and prayers consumed me until suddenly I noticed I was at mile 24, and I miraculously ran my fastest split. People were stopping dead in their tracks from cramping. I saw medics cart off three people within one mile. Yet I was smiling. During the final 2.6 miles I had an epiphany. I realized Micah deserved to live as full of a life as me, and that fullness relies on my strength to be in optimal health for as long as possible. Although I was only running that day, at that moment I realized tri-ing was my new normal. It was my key to well-rounded workouts. To optimizing my health, and to maintaining the strength I need for caring for Micah for as long as I can. Lifting Micah’s well-over 100 pound body takes strength and technique several times a day. My tri-strength gives me and my wife the ongoing energy and optimism to given him the same opportunities “normal” kids and families have. It looks a bit chaotic, but my wife Janelle, older son, Brayden, and I can get Micah loaded and his chair parts packed up and onto an airplane in less than 10 minutes. We might ask for a little help from a friends dad or mom, but we see to it he goes to all the birthday parties, sleepovers, and activities he’s invited to. He’s going to his second summer camp this year in mid-August. I’ll be there, keeping my distance when that’s what he wants, but getting him into the pool with his friends, helping him eat, and laying him down in his bunk each night. These things take energy and fitness that frankly I don’t think I’d have if it weren’t for being a triathlete. His camp won’t include violent video games. It will be filled with the girls he has crushes on, his crazy friends, sunshine, pools, and loud stuff. i know it will be the time of his life - so far. And that’s why I tri.
22 Comments
Francis Tomaszewski
8/2/2017 12:29:13 pm
Very, very inspiring story, really enjoyed reading in fact I read the story twice, thank you for sharing.
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Lance
8/4/2017 07:01:23 pm
Frank - Thank you for the thoughtful comments. I really appreciate your very kind words.
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Craig Tebeau
8/2/2017 12:34:23 pm
What a great story - thanks for sharing.
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Lorie Waggett
8/2/2017 02:06:06 pm
Great story Lance--you are a devoted and loving Dad to
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vince ayers
8/2/2017 03:49:47 pm
thank you for sharing
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Beth McDonnell
8/2/2017 04:12:05 pm
You are an inspiration to all parents! Proud to be your friend!
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Sarah Lynch
8/2/2017 04:35:00 pm
Now that's a treat of a read. Thank you. Keep inspiring!!
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Dan Benoit
8/2/2017 07:15:21 pm
Thank you!
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Mary Ann Olson
8/2/2017 09:12:53 pm
You my friend are a very special person, as is your wife. Micah is lucky to have you and you guys are lucky to have him. Same for Big Brother. You brought tears to my eyes but lots of love in my heart. God Bless you all. Love, Me
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Lisa Blauvelt
8/2/2017 09:25:39 pm
Since we got to know each other in Chicago last year, I'm so proud to call you my friend. You are an amazing dad and athlete and I know Micah knows it too - thanks for sharing this with the team!
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8/3/2017 07:43:35 am
God has blessed you with a special gift, Mikah, and I'm so happy to hear your family gets so much joy from him. You are an inspiration on how dedicated you are to your family and staying healthy. Love seeing all your posts!! Thank you for sharing your journey!!
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Patty Swedberg
8/3/2017 08:26:01 am
I love our community and that it includes awesome and amazing dads and moms and families like yours, Lance. I love that you took the time to write this and that triathlon can be a tool in your work as a dad. This warmed my heart!!! Thanks!
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D'Arcy Richardson
8/3/2017 10:43:04 am
Hi Lance, this was very moving, causing my eyes to get very misty, but then you were always a good kid. I wonder about you now and again, what you're doing and now I know.
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Heidi
8/3/2017 10:48:33 am
You are an inspiration! What a wonderful father you are Lance. Thank you for sharing your heart and story.
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Andriette C Hall
8/3/2017 09:49:31 pm
Thank you for sharing this very inspiring, "Why I Tri," Lance. The love for your son and that you put into action to provide a full life for both Micah and yourself truly makes you a hero in my mind!
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Dave Raftis
8/3/2017 11:57:40 pm
Wow - I am inspired by your dedication to Micah and even more by Micah himself.
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Alex Crampton
8/4/2017 09:50:51 am
What an absolutely amazing and inspirational read! Thank you for sharing your story!
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Katie
8/4/2017 10:20:09 am
Thank you!❤️
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Sandi Black
8/4/2017 06:44:29 pm
Thank you for sharing your heart. Micah has touched me deeply
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Griggs
8/5/2017 06:25:11 am
My best friend in College during my final year had MD. His name is Gordon Daubenspeck. Gordy to most of us. 240-Gordy to those of us closest to him. Your blog post reminded me of him, and reminded me that he is now with Jesus, and is jumping, leaping, and praising God. We spent many hours together playing cards. Hearts mostly. Spades too. Your blog reminded me that he was a normal young man, wanting to graduate college, and having crushes on cute girls like most of the rest of us. I look forward to seeing him again when I get to go be with Jesus. Micah is blessed to have you as a Dad. God knew what he was doing when He gave Micah to you and Janelle. And even if you are bad at video games (I am as well) you are always there with him and for him. Your tireless dedication is an inspiration to me, and should be an inspiration to all of us. God gave you Micah as a son, just as God gave me 240-Gordy as best friend in college. It is a wonderful memory of a season in life I cherish. I am blessed to have you as a B-I-L and pray for you a lot. That God would be your strength and song. That He would be your focus as you continue to raise and care for Micah. Love you lots Lance!
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Bob Leslie
8/5/2017 09:34:44 pm
Thanks Lance; loved your message and courage as you live your life trying to make Micah's life more full. Blessings to you!
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Sid Hester
12/25/2017 10:52:41 am
Dear Lance your family "LOVE IS AWESOME "! GOD BLESS!
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